I totally schooled a boy

Thursday we took the entire 8th grade on a field trip. It wasn't a long trip, or even a far away place, but it was still a headache. I was put on a bus with some kids from our team that think they're just too cool. The leader decides he's all that and a bag of chips so he puts the window down. Not an issue except is is 33 outside and snowing! 

Me: put the window up. 

Boy A: I'm hot.

Me: Then take off your sweatshirt and put the window up. 

Boy tries to put the window up. Can't get it.

Tries again.

Boy: I can't, it is stuck. 

Me: Well, you better figure it out and get it up. 

Boy still can't close the window. His buddy next to him tries and fails. The boy in the seat in front of him tries, fails. 

Me: Move, I'll do it. 

First try the window goes up. All the boys around at like "ooooooooohhhhh she showed you!" And he lost one chip off his shoulder. Then, I hear a kid behind me say, "it's all that Crossfit!" 

Yes, yes it is. 💪😎

Then we had a debate about if I actually did Crossfit or not because apparently you don't do Crossfit unless you shout it from the rooftops? 

Friday was a killer workout and when I woke up this morning I was a little shocked. I had an itch on my chest kind of by my armpit and it felt weird when I scratched it! There is a muscle where there used to be more fat! 😳 That's exciting! I am a little sore too. My back/shoulder muscles and calves are letting me know they are growing. It is a nice feeing since I'm not getting visual results yet. Next week will be the real test though. I have to try on the dress so I have enough time to make any necessary alterations... 

No matter what, I did more laundry and cleaning today than I have in awhile and I've done a whole month of Crossfit. That's better than yesterday! 

And I went ahead and signed up for 6 more months of it. 

Deadlifts

Today really was an easy workout. It is ironic because I had almost talked myself out of going. This weekend was brutal! We moved all the rock in the front of the house, dug up 5 bushes, planted raspberry bushes, laid weed fabric, and then put all the rocks back. That was just Saturday! Sunday consisted of hanging gutters, planting strawberries in the gutters, fencing the garden off, and transplanting most of the house plants. There are still a few things to do yet but they will have to wait. 

So I had almost convinced myself to just stay home. I had done enough heavy lifting this weekend that I deserved that right? Then came the guilt trip voice about how I am complaining about my weight and wanting to improve and stick this out. So I went. I have been faithful to three days a week since I started official classes, can't break the streak now. 

So today was a short warm up then working on maxing out back squats, strict press, and deadlifts. Back squats are interesting because today is the first day of doing them in a workout. I managed to get to 90 lbs! I really wanted 100 but we ran out of time and I don't know if I could have. The strict press was difficult! But made it up to 60! I went for 65 but that just wasn't happening today. I'm still impressed! 

Then came deadlifts... I can rock the legs so I knew I could get up there in weight. My mental goal was to break 100 for sure! So we started lighter and worked up. By the end I was at my max and had to dig out the calculator!! 155. That's right... I deadlifted 155 lbs of weight! Goal busted! 

On the other front though I'm still frustrated with weight. I cheated this weekend and ate a hamburger and a bun! 😳 For the first time in a long time I didn't think anything of the bun when ordering. Oops. So I ate it. It was so tasty after a long day in the sun working hard. But seriously, will I ever fit real clothes again? Tomorrow is the day to do measurements and so we shall see but I don't think there is much progress there. 

I was doing more research and it said 3-6 months to stop seeing weight gain. I REALLY don't want to keep gaining, no matter how slowly, for a few more months! So, starting tomorrow I'm more strict on the diet. Seriously. I know I keep telling myself that but I think this is where the old idea of a new resolution every week comes in. I'm no longer allowed to buy processed sugar or dairy. I can finish what I have, I can eat it at Jon's, but I'm not buying it again. 

Then I also read a little about intermittent fasting? I think I need to do more research and then try it out when my schedule goes back to more normal. 

I just need a win... I'd take any one of the following: pants buttoning, back under 175, and/or more definition. 

On the definition note, did you know there is a rather large muscle on your shin? I found mine this weekend. Now if only I could get more defined calves and thighs....

Some Changes

So after completing my body measurements again this morning and seeing NO change... That's right... none, I contemplated a lot. (I actually started this last night after my workout since I know I am not seeing the change I want.)

Diet. 

Diet is supposed to be a huge part of weight loss and seeing physical change. I get that, I know that. In 2013 I had an ALCAT test done to test for food sensitivities. Once I stuck tot he diet I easily dropped 10-15 lbs. Just from diet! I wasn't getting a lot of exercise in those days... I know foods that are on my "no-no" list add to my weight. So much in fact that I know eating certain foods will make my pants unbuttonable (except right now all the dress pants are and jeans ain't pretty) and a few days of back on the diet works. 

Exercise. 

I found that as long as I stuck to the diet I could modify my weight about 5lbs-ish with exercise. After periods of no exercise I could drop 3-5lbs easily. Yeah, yeah, I know water weight.. but I could keep it off if I keep it up. 

So that's where Crossfit came in. Holidays came. I cheated on my diet. I ate a lot of things that weren't on the approved foods list and I paid for it. I also stopped taking birth control. I wanted to see what my body would do if I stopped. That and the one my new insurance covered would lead to spotting every time I took the pill even a hour off schedule. Sorry, I'm not going to be tied down to something like that just to avoid cramps. So I KNOW my hormones were crazy. After realizing I couldn't kick the weight and my hormones may have something to do with this I went to see an acupuncturist. Crazy right?! 

Well, it helped. My moods leveled out. I felt more calm. I handle stress better (most days) now. Overall I am just happier. I'm sure other life factors play a role, but it helped. But the weight came back, all 5 lbs I lost. I had also started drinking more water. There is an app Plant Nanny that I use and grow adorable plants by watering them as I drink water. It is adorable. I use it to make sure I drink enough. Dating a guy who drinks gallons a day... literally... like 4 gallons is his average... also helps. But, still not helping. 

It doesn't matter if I stick to my diet or cheat, drink lots or not, exercise or not. I can't kick this weight! So I figure I need a new workout routine. One that will kick my butt. That's why I picked Crossfit. I didn't do it because it was supposed to be easy. 

Now I'm on week 4 of Crossfit and I'm not seeing any changes. I did and then I gained it all back. I'm feeling changes. I know I'm getting stronger. I know there are muscles building. But I'm not showing those results. I'm not showing them on the scale. I'm not showing them with a tape measure. And unless you squeeze my legs, I'm not showing them on my body either. How am I supposed to reach my goals if nothing is changing? 

So I thought and thought. Here are some things I have thought of that I'm going to do: 

No more being lazy. I wake up at 5:00am for Crossfit at 5:30. I get home from Crossfit at about 6:45 ish and can still shower, eat, and all that and still get to school on time. So, the alarm is getting set for 5;00 everyday and I'm going to use the treadmill and at least walk, or take the dog for a walk, or jog, or something active for a minimum of 30 min in the mornings. Burn more calories. Plus, it will help with the next idea. 

Fasting. Years ago I used to read a blog, I Miss My Collar Bone, and she mentioned fasting. That's one thing I remember standing out and helped her to boost weight loss. (Somehow I failed to realize she was also doing Crossfit and Paleo eating... I don't remember any of that!) I started doing more research. There is a lot of good things to be said about it... hormone leveling, weight loss, fat loss, increased workout skills, etc. There are some negatives to watch out for too so I will be paying close attention to my body for sure. But, I feel like it might be something to try as mornings when I work out I'm not hungry when I need to be eating breakfast and typically force myself to eat something so I won't be hungry later. To start with I'm going to try just not forcing myself to eat breakfast if I'm not hungry. Then I can't eat lunch until lunch time at school so maybe I will be able to do this? It is worth a shot. And I promise.... I will stop if I feel dizzy, sick, have trouble thinking, etc. 

Paleo. Well, at least more paleo. I already skip the gluten. Since going to acupuncture I have also backed off on the dairy. Mostly now I just eat cheese on stuff and ice cream once in awhile. So, now we are going to eat what is left and then no more buying the stuff. No more dairy. No more cheese. No more processed sugar. No more grains. No more foods on the naughty list. If we want to see results then we need to get serious. 

We will give this a week to see if there are any changes. If no signs of anything then I will probably set another appointment for acupuncture to see if that can help. If there still are no changes then I'm going to see about getting the ALCAT done again this summer. 

Box Jumps and 95 lb Dead Lifts

Today was a win. I needed a win. I got it!

During the warm up we were supposed to do box jumps. I know I can make it on the box. I know I can do it. Just somehow when I go to move I freak myself out! Even after I grabbed a weight to use as a little booster I just couldn't jump. One of the guys watching mentioned stepping into the jump. So step then hop up on the box. That was more hilarious than me trying without the step. Then I figured out that if I hopped onto the weight on the floor then I could do the jump onto the box. So there I was... bunny hopping into my box jumps. After about half of them I could do it from standing on the weight. No step, no hop, just a jump.

Then we did 5x5 dead lifts. I went all the way up to 95 lbs! I probably could have done 100 but figured we still had the workout and I didn't want to push it THAT far. That's exciting though. I'm almost in the triple digits for weight on something!

Then came the push-ups. Did I mention I face-planted my first few push-ups? Well, today I did THREE, chest to floor, full on push-ups in the warming up part. Then came the workout.
Today was:  400 m run, 25 push-ups, 25 hang power cleans.

Coach did allow me to decrease the weight for the cleans but only cut the push-ups down to 10. They were a struggle but I did manage to finish in 19:49! You also realize how great you are at running (although I'm still slow) when the 400 m run becomes your time to catch your breath.

So today I can honestly say... I was way better than yesterday.

The day after...

So, Tuesday was one of those days and I wrote a whole post about it. I woke up Wednesday determined to go to Crossfit, push myself, and do something about the fact that nothing seemed ok on Tuesday. Thank goodness it was a mobility day!!! So thankful! And I looked at the workout and saw kettle bell swings and box jumps. Not bad! It was a lot of swings but I got em! 

Then came time to set up for the workout... Get your kettle bell, a back support if you like, and your box. Wait, what? What's the support thing for? The sit ups. I whipped my head towards the board and sure enough... Sit ups. 

Now i have known for a long while that sit ups hurt me. Seriously hurt. I can do maybe 10 before curling into the fetal position and crying. It isn't a lasting pain but one that hurts like none other in the moment. And it is in my back, not even my abs. It happens with sit-ups, crunches, leg lifts, and most other ab exercises I have seen. 

So I ask about it and I use a fancy back helper thing with the tailbone support thing to try some out. It just might work. So on to the two round workout! 60 kettle bell swings, 40 sit ups, and 20 box jumps. Yeah... I'm supposed to do 80 total sit ups! But, I'm pushing myself and thinking of the awesome 6 pack I can gain from this... We got this. We shall overcome. 

After the coach took my light kettle bell to give to someone who needed it because he had faith in me that I could do the next one up (I was already thinking I would probably switch for the second round) we began. 60 kettle bell swings. I made it to the 40's before I had to pause! Sit-ups. I pushed and pushed. I paused a lot after 15. By 30 I was dying. By 37 I was breaking between everyone and he came over to encourage me and I flat out told him it hurts! It hurts bad! But I was going to finish the last few. And I did. The box jumps I did on a stack of weights instead and then went back to struggle with my second set of swings. Really struggled. And back to sit-ups. Oh my there was pain. And I was pushing through. 5. 7. 12. 13. 14. Dear Lord, please let me survive, 15. And it took all I had to make 16, 17, and 18. He came back. I had the girl to my right pushing me on. And on 19 all I could say was "I'm only getting 20 out this round." And that was ok. I worked through the pain for 20. 

When I finally sat down after box jumps it began to sink in. The pain. The fact that I just kicked my ass. The muscle exhaustion. All of it. I started to hyperventilate! It took all I had to not freak out right then. So I calmed my breathing. I pushed back the tears. I put my stuff away and I was out. I dropped my workout partner off at home and began to cry. 

Not only from everything that I just went through, but also because I accomplished something major (60 sit-ups!) and the fact that I couldn't do the whole workout. Nothing feels worse after a day like Tuesday than not being able to finish a workout. It sucked! And then I saw my shrugging muscles in the mirror and that helped. But I did allow myself a good cry first. 

The rest of the day was just bogus and same with today. So tonight I planted my garden! I'm happy! I also scheduled on my calendar when all should be ready to harvest. Including the whole packet of carrots I dumped in the square planted with spinach. Oops. 😳

Still, I did SIXTY sit-ups! And today I stayed calm in a crappy, stressful situation. I rocked life better than yesterday for sure. Ready for a new day. 

Today was one of THOSE days

You know. The day where nothing seems to go right? The day where you question if you're good at your job? The day where you look around and ask yourself why things haven't evolved into what you hope for? The day where you just want to curl up on the couch and cry? 

We all have them. Today was just one of them. 

It started after waking up excited to see data on my progress. I can feel lees giggle so the numbers have to show something right?! Step on the scale... Up 3 pounds from last week. Ok. I'm gaining muscle. Measure my bicep... Gained back the .5" I had lost. Really? Half an inch? Come on, it is probably just a measuring fluke. Chest is still the same even though I'd LOVE to see some loss there. Seriously... I could lose a little.... Torso... Gained back the .5". *sigh* Waist went from 40" two weeks ago to 38.5" last week! Back to 40" this week.... *sigh again* I also found one of the inches I had lost on my hips and still holding on the thigh. 

Body measurements aren't everything. That's dumb to think. Same with the number on a scale. I feel less giggle! That's a step! 

Then I turned around to pick out something to wear. It was anothe morning trying to figure out another outfit that doesn't require a real waistband. No dress pants for me... that would require the ability to button them. Do you know how heartbreaking it is to not be able to button your pants? Sure I have a pair or two of jeans that I can fit into but as a teacher I try not to wear jeans daily. Plus, I'm down to one pair that doesn't have holes or thin patches in them and that's the smallest pair. 

Then I get to school and I kid you not.... I look over during the first class and two kids are trying to lick their elbow. Seriously. How do you even respond to that?! And that is the best way to describe the kids today. A girl asked me what you call the bone in your chin and didn't believe me when I told her "that's your jaw." I started grading some solid, liquid, gas diagrams that I had them do and some seriously don't make sense at all! I gave them the answers in a short reading in case they didn't remember all the info. It was just a long, continuous face palm kind of day. 

Then something else came up and the thought of "just go buy new pants!" was rolling around in my mind. That sparked the whole thought path about not having money. I know they told me I wouldn't make money as a teacher. I get it. My choice. But I save. I do pretty darn good too. Just when I get some saved something happens though. I bought a house! Woot! The next month I needed a new differential on the car. That was my back up savings there. I get a raise! That's how I paid for the trip to Jamaicia for the Bestie's wedding. Trip paid for and taken care of and then I get my tax return! Yep, that's going to replace the back up savings I used. Parents decided to help out and pay off my loan to my grandma! Now that money goes towards the credit card debt I have (not a whole lot). Next will be the student loans. I also got a summer job that should be paying $6000!! Woot! That's a new laptop to replace the one that is a zombie it is so past dying. And the rest? That should take care of the credit cards and a student loan. I know, I live on the wild side. 

So why is it I always feel behind? Why am I always playing catch up? I hate this game. Make more money you say. Get a second job. I can't survive the first one, how do I survive the second? Plus I have one... or three. I sell Jamberry and Thirty-one but hate pushing to the same 10 people who are in similar situations to mine. The third is a tutoring gig that so far has gotten me zero hours. But I am also helping with an ACT prep course... That still isn't really bringing in a lot of dough. 

So, today was not better than yesterday. Today was just one of those days. But, I did better at getting some grading done today so I was better at something. Tomorrow I will start it off right with a workout. 

Week 3

On my way to CrossFit today, it dawned on me that today was weak three, the beginning. When do I have to stop saying I'm new to Crossfit? Also, go me! This is week THREE!!

So this weekend I noticed my legs are more solid. I've always had pretty solid calves and running recently has helped those. But my thighs and butt are getting less giggly! My muffin top in the back (the part I hate the most) is also getting smaller. But, I still haven't lost much weight. I don't start my days at 180 this week, but I also dont consider 178 much different. Menstrual bloating doesn't help either. My hope is to see a weight change next week. OR, since I'm still gaining muscle, I'd settle for just being able to button my dress pants again! 

Anyway, it is week 3. Last Friday I ended the week with a crazy workout. They call it "Fight Gone Bad" if that tells you anything. We did our run out and back and then a warm up. From there the other pre-workout time where we usually work on skills of some sort, or increasing weight, was spent setting up. It is one minute of each: wall balls, sumo dead lift high pulls, box jumps, push press, row. Rest for two minutes and go again. You count one of everything and thencalories on the rower. I made a total of 179 in the three rounds. I thought the board said 5 rounds and you cannot imagine my excitement when the coach said we were almost done. 

Today's workout was easier yet kicked my lungs in the butt. 3 front squats and 3 burpees. AMRAP. (As many rounds as possible) I managed to do 6+3! (6 rounds with 3 squats) 

Is it a lot? No. Is it more than I could do yesterday? Hell yes! And this weekend I was able to start seeing results. I was excited when I held up my arm and could see slight deltoid definition coming. My thighs giggle less. My butt is more firm. And my brother even said something to the fact that he finds me attractive, but I'm getting more attractive and he's worried what will happen if I stick with it. :)

I'm pumped. I'm tempted to sign up for 6 months since it takes another $25 a month off the fee and I'm liking it. It definitely isn't me or something I would normally do, but I'm liking the fact that I'm gaining upper body strength! Like, I did TWO push-ups (on knees) today! (Face planted my first one there)

100 Shoulder to Overheads

100 Shoulder to Overheads.

Do you know what that means? That means I didn't wash my hair this morning and tomorrow is looking iffy too.

After a warm up that was alright and then 15 min to work on skills we got to the workout. For skill today I worked on jump roping. I knew we would be using a lot of upper body in the workout and that being my weak point I opted for some lower body. Jump roping makes your hamstrings burn. Like seriously BURN. Double-unders still escape me but I will get there one day. I'm just proud that I jump roped for the first time since like 3rd grade!

Then on to the workout: 100 shoulder to overheads with 20 lateral jumps on every minute. I tried to do just the 15lb bar but peer pressure made me add 2-10lb weights. I made it to 85 before I couldn't lift it anymore and opted for just the bar again. But, I did it! I did all 100!!! At about 80 it was time for more jumps (they turned into step overs at some point) and after the coach told me that it was my last set and I could be done. I told him no! I was going to get to 100 even if it killed me! Then my work out buddy was done so I had her strip her weights off her bar and finished using her bar.

Surprisingly I can still lift my arm! Just don't ask me to lift any weight or put pressure on anything. I can get the whiteboard eraser up but I can't erase the board because it requires too much effort.

Again... I did better than I did yesterday!

Week 1 Towards a New Me

Week one was rough. I won't lie. It wasn't the best week to kick my workout routine into high gear, but no week would be a good week either. We started the state standardized tests which means we switch to 2 hour block schedules. Switching my routine doesn't go well. Switching 135 teen agers' schedules doesn't go well. The kids go stir crazy during this time! AND... We get to do this for three and a half weeks. Joy!

So the kids are regressing to elementary mind sets and I decide to go work out like a beast. Monday I went to the 5:00 pm class and it kicked my butt. We did snatches which I was told is the hardest move in Crossfit. (I have since been told this about a few moves lol) I went back Wednesday morning at 5:30 and got my butt kicked! 

Now, let me put this into perspective... I'm so weak in my upper body that I literally face planted my first push up. And that was a "girl style" push-up on my knees... My second workout involved pull ups. 

One thing that makes me feel great about Crossfit is the fact that they can scale it to any ability level! I did those pull ups. I did ALL the pull ups! I just did them jumping on a stack of weights. Before you start thinking about how easy that is you should know that you start from a hanging position with your arms, drive up with your legs and share the burden with your arms to get your chin above the bar. And no, I couldn't stand with my chin above the bar to start. On my second round a lady told me to drive more with my legs to help my arms more and my response was, "I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS!" They were so sore and I was pushing them even more, but I know it is what I need. I went back Friday morning. 

By Friday I was tired. I was tired of feeling sore. I was tired of dreading steps. I was tired of kicking my own ass only to gain weight. I was tired of the kids who decided they didn't have to act like they were at school anymore. I was tired of every pair of dress pants NOT buttoning. I was tired of trying to figure out outfits with elastic waist bands so they would fit. (Seriously, I wore a skirt and a dress last week so I didn't have to wear real pants) I was tired of putting effort in to everything and just feeling like it was pointless. Needless to say I was put in timeout after school and took a nap. 

I read a few things that said you'll gain weight at the beginning. You're building muscle. You're retaining water and inflammation with the soreness. It will go away. You'll reach a point where you have so much muscle you start burning fat like crazy. But when the scale reads 182 and 183 you start to panic. (180 is my dreaded weight) 

On top of that I am excited that I have broken out of my comfort zone and started something new. But at the same time it is so tough! Friday began with me wanting to cry at the gym and that was only at the beginning of the warm up! Seriously, it hurts when you're sore. On the other hand though I don't want to become another person who only talks about Crossfit. So I decided to start up the ol blog. Here you don't have to read it if you don't want to hear it. 

So I trudged on and made it to the gym on Monday again. Since Friday I have been dragging another lady who went to the beginning classes with me. It helps us both be accountable. I left feeling great! The weekend helped the soreness and the workout was difficult but didn't leave me as sore as the rest. I felt better about myself and felt on the path to success. I had also begun to take body measurements so this morning I woke up and did those to find out that I was in fact seeing a change for the better. Is it huge? No. It has only been a week!!! But it is change in the right direction. I will work on updating the body measurement page in the next few days,

I just have to be better than yesterday. 

2016

So it has been awhile since I added anything to this blog and in these past few years a lot has changed. I won't go into details about everything as this is about my resolutions for the year. So, instead just a brief intro to how 2016 has started:

I'm dating a guy who is awesome and very fit. We think a lot alike and enjoy similar things. He is awesome. 

I'm teaching 8th grade science. I love it. The kids are a hoot and as most middle school students are, are all over the place! But I like it and think I will stay here for awhile. 

Oh, a big event, I bought a town house last summer! It was in need of some updating so many projects were completed last summer and more are in progress and planning. 

Now, the reason why I picked up this blog again... Over the last few months I have gained weight. Like I was close to the weight that I never wanted to reach! Years ago I watched a show about the worlds fattest man and all the other TLC shows (is that still a channel?) about obese people and all I could think of was, "How do you let it get that bad?" It isn't like you wake up over night and suddenly you're 200-300 lbs heavier. Did they not notice? So I set 180 as my "do everything you can" weight. If I ever reach this weight then I need to start doing everything I can to get in better shape. Unless of course I was pure muscle which isn't me. 

So when I went from 165 to 175 in the matter of a month or two (DARN HOLIDAY SEASON!!) I figured it was time to do something. Then I had to stop denying that the scale read 175 just the other day and that 178 was just water weight. When 179 started to show up I began to panic. Literally. ONE pound away from my limit. 

This led me to look for some major changes. I have run TWO 5ks. Like ran the whole thing! Last one was for St. Pat's so not even that long ago! So it isn't like I wasn't exercising. Could I do more? Yeah. But what? My bestie got married in Jan in Jamaica and in looking at pictures from the reception my arms make me look kind of bad. So I decided I need to tone. I have leg/running muscles but I need to tone my upper body. This led me to checking out the local rec center prices so maybe I could go to the gym. I also checked out the BF's gym prices (NOT in a teacher salary range especially with how far away from me it is). I then thought about it and realized I tried the gym in HS and didn't see a whole lot of results. So how was I going to do things differently? I don't know anything about weight lifting! Besides that I always seem to talk myself out of the "hard stuff." So, that wasn't going to work. 

Enter Crossfit.

Yep. Crossfit. 

I signed up for the "on ramp" classes where they teach you everything you need to know and set out to tone my body and hopefully lose some weight. The reception is in May for the same wedding from Jan and I will be wearing the same dress so I want it to look better. I'm in my 2nd week of "real" classes and will write more about that in the next post. 

My overall resolution this year: Be better than I was yesterday. (Goes with every aspect of life)